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The Passage of Time

Somehow it's the middle of October already. I'm not quite sure how this escaped my notice as it was occurring.

The way time passes fascinates me... when I was college and teaching high school, the days went so slowly, but the weeks quickly. Does this make sense? My days were so full of so many things to do -- and paradoxically, five days with lots to do would go by very quickly. So quickly, in fact, that when I think back to my year teaching, sometimes it feels like it never happened. Like I went straight from being a free-loading test grader with an unused teaching license living in Bloomington, MN, to being a graduate student. I know this isn't true, because I've got these crazy and awesome memories of that year. But it feels that way sometimes.

Now it just feels like everything's rushing by. I still feel as if school just started and the workload is still in that "beginning of the year, not very hard" mode. But my roommates have midterms this week. Have we really been here that long?

Anyway. When I was younger, I would have thoughts about these points of time in the future and what my life would look like then, and what I would have accomplished. Like, I would picture myself as a college senior when I was 14 years old. Then when I actually was a college senior, I would suddenly remember my mental image from back then, and laugh at how less mature and less different I am than what I thought I'd be.

Except, at a certain point, all the things I thought of when I was younger got exhausted. I never really thought past college. I was kind of sad to realize that when it happened a few years ago -- it was the first ever negative feeling I had towards getting older. Now I'm developing more ideas about how I'd like my life to look in the future, but they don't have the same aura of innocence and endless possibility that they used to.

It's funny how sometimes you will exceed your own expectations about how quickly things happen in your life, though. Like, I really didn't think I'd be dating someone so soon in the year. (See following entry if this is news to you.) Shows what I know, I guess. Grad school is awesome.

So. "Time is moving, so we ride it." (What I Know, Storyhill) Ride on.


This page contains a single entry from the blog posted on October 13, 2004 4:18 PM.

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